Traditionally Speaking…by Pat Larsen - Adventures at the MALL

Rarely, would you ever find us at the Mall. But there we were one day  having my Iphone repaired. Just to clarify, we avoided the malls for many years. That most likely began during the pandemic  but nevertheless, here we were again. 

You may be aware that IF you have to have your phone repaired, it typically  requires an appointment at the Geek squad desk and will take 2 hours even with that appointment, until it is handed back,  good as new.  

So we had plenty of time to get re-acquainted with those name brand shops, bubble tea kiosks and the assortment of entertainment venues that now replaced some of the basic name brand stores that we frequented, “back in the day.”

Without question we racked up quite a few “steps” on our devices walking down the aisles for those 2 hours. We must’ve looked like we had just landed on this planet by the expressions on our faces. Most of what we now saw were gaming venues that replaced clothing and shoe stores. We saw the sign that a popular book chain was returning soon…but at this point it was nowhere in sight.

Build-a Bear shops were heavily populated with the little ones and retail chains were replaced with gaming cafes, and “video game “experiences” for all ages. 

And THAT wasn’t the most interesting aspect of our experience.

We decided to sit for a while, after quite a bit of walking…It seemed that the hands on my watch never moved so slowly as it did on this day as we waited for that notification that my phone repair was ready to be picked up.

It was during that time that we began to notice the “mall people”...they were of all ages, walking by us, faces planted intently on their phone screens, taking little to no notice of anything around them as they made their way to who knows where.

Not just a few people were engaged in this activity… without exaggeration, everyone was.

Among the most entertaining and awe inspiring of mall walkers were those who never took their eyes off of their screens as they stepped onto and off of the  moving escalators. They did so with such a practiced finesse that it left me thinking this could be considered a future Olympic event.

Eventually, I was notified that my iphone was repaired and we made our way out to the parking area…but not before we watched a woman pushing a baby carriage into oncoming traffic, never noticing the cars heading in her direction because she was scrolling on her phone. 

Clearly, we were out of our element and had decided that we’d steer clear of the Mall going forward unless absolutely necessary. 

Pat Larsen is a syndicated columnist who lives, works, plays and prays in Greene County, NY. Have a thought to share…contact Pat at 518-275-8686.